Different Greek Words for Love?

There are two main Greek words for “love” in the New Testament:

• agapē, and its related verb agapaō; and
• philia, and its related verb phileō

It is popularly taught that these two Greek words have special meanings. This has resulted in several myths about these words.

Myth #1: Agapē/agapaō is the highest form of love. It refers to God’s love, and not man’s love.

If this were true, then no ungodly person would be capable of agapē/agapaō. However, that is not the case. Consider the following uses of agapē/agapaō:

• In Luke 6:32, “sinners love those who love them.”
• In Luke 11:43, the Pharisees “love the best seats in the synagogues.”
• In John 3:19, ungodly, evil men “loved the darkness rather than the light.”
• In John 12:43, the Pharisees “loved the praise of men.”
• In 1 John 2:15, “If anyone loves the world, then the love of the Father is not in him.”
• In 2 Peter 2:15, the evil prophet Balaam “loved the wage of unrighteousness.”

In all these passages, the Greek word for “love” is agapaō. Yet, they do not describe the highest form of love, let alone God’s love.

Myth #2: Philia/phileō is man’s love, and not God’s love.

In Titus 3:4, the Apostle Paul wrote that God has a “love for mankind” (HCSB). The Greek word there is philanthrōpia, which is made up of two parts: (1) philia, meaning “love”, and (2) and anthrōpos, meaning “man; mankind”. This indicates that God has a “philia-love” for mankind!

God also loves believers with “philia-love” as well. In Revelation 3:19, the Lord said to the church in Laodicea, “As many as I love, I rebuke and discipline.” The Greek word for “love” here is phileō.

Greek scholar Daniel Wallace notes that phileō is “a term that is never used of God/Jesus loving unbelievers in the NT. (Indeed, it would be impossible for God to have this kind of love for an unbeliever, for it routinely speaks of enjoyment and fellowship.”

Myth #3: Philia/phileō is a lesser kind of love than agapē/agapaō.

In the Gospel of John, a certain individual is referred to as “the disciple whom Jesus loved” five times. Four of those times, the word agapaō is used (13:23; 19:26; 21:7, 20), but one time, the word phileō is used (20:2). Does this mean that Jesus loved this individual with a lesser kind of love in that one verse than in the other four verses? Of course not.

In John 3:35, Jesus said, “The Father loves the Son,” using the word agapaō. However, in John 5:20, Jesus said, “the Father loves the Son,” this time using the word phileō. Does this mean that the Father sometimes loves the Son with a lesser kind of love than at other times? Of course not.

By the way, phileō can also mean “to kiss” (cf. Matt. 26:48; Mark 14:44; Luk. 22:47). On the other hand, agapaō cannot mean “to kiss”.

Myth #4: Erōs/eraō is sexual love.

Another Greek word for “love” is erōs/eraō. It is popularly claimed that erōs/eraō always refers to sexual love. However, this is not always true in every context.

The Greek historian Polybius wrote about the Macedonian King Philip:

… he became loved by the Greeks because of his beneficence of policy.

— Histories 7.11.8.

The Greek word for “loved” here is eraō. This does not mean that the Greeks had a sexual love for Philip.

Conclusion

It is certainly true that agapē/agapaō and philia/phileō are two different words, each with its own set of meanings. However, in reality, both sets of meanings overlap, and in many contexts, they mean the same thing: love.

If we want to learn about God’s love, then we should study what is written in the Scriptures about God’s love. Indeed, we would find that God’s love is the highest form of love; it is selfless and sacrificial. However, we know this because of what God has revealed in the Scriptures about his love, and not because the Greek words agapē/agapaō and philia/phileō have any special meaning in themselves.